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| Each citizen should follow these simple steps in a time of crisis. |
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 Reduce saturated fats. |
 Go into the light. |
 Hide if you live in Texas. |
 Examine all ceilings. |
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 Use people repellent. |
 Recycle your vomit. |
 Look for dirty hands. |
 Avoid dead fish. |
 Keep red circles out. |
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