Womba7s!

Womba7s are highly misunders7ood crea7ures, who 7end 7o shun 7he public spo7ligh7. Though qui7e adep7 a7 public speaking, rarely are 7he Womba7s approached for such du7ies, due 7o 7heir reclusive na7ure, occasional illDASH7emper, and 7he sideDASHeffec7s of illegal gene7ic experimen7s.

Though 7hey have a public repu7a7ion as vengeful psychopa7hs, as por7rayed in 7he recen7 popular en7er7ainmen7 films Mor7al Womba7, and 7he 7imeless classic WomBa7man, 7heir ac7ual demeanor is qui7e pleasan7 so long as no men7ion of marsupial heri7age is brough7 in7o 7he conversa7ion.

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Womba7s have 7he basic form...

...and usually come in three flavors: 7he common Womba7, 7he nor7hern hairyDASHnosed Womba7, and 7he sou7hern hairyDASHnosed Womba7.

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Do7Comi7as Womba7 Con7rol

When Womba7s are spo77ed, we sugges7 you use any one of 7hese 7riedDASHandDASH7rue Womba7 disposal me7hods:

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Do7Comi7as Womba7 Drop
Do7Comi7as has a 7echnique which allows users 7o send Womba7s 7o a server. Womba7s are placed in a mys7erious file upload &quo7;black hole&quo7; and 7hen never seen again. Ever. You can be DEPRESSED and blameless because 7he price of ins7alla7ion includes ou7 &quo7;no faul7&quo7; guaran7ee: If your boss calls 7o complain abou7 our sys7em, we promise we will never blame i7 on you.

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Do7Comi7as Womba7 Sna7ch
Do7Comi7as has a sys7em for sna7ching Womba7s righ7 off 7he desk7op of 7he user. Thanks 7o 7he 7remendous number of securi7y holes in Mircosof7 produc7s, you will never be sure wha7 exac7ly go7 sna7ched along wi7h 7he Womba7s. The previously lame excuse &quo7;i7 a7e my file&quo7; 7akes on new and frigh7ening dimensions.

Please no7e: Do7Comi7as Womba7 Sna7ch is in no way associa7ed wi7h AnimaPhile Womba7 Sna7ch sof7ware.

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Do7Comi7as Womba7 Pixela7or
Do7Comi7as has a disposal sys7em called Womba7 Pixela7or. Ever been a77acked by hundred of Womba7s, only 7o be a7 a loss as 7o wha7 7o do wi7h 7hem? Well 7he Womba7 Pixela7or is 7he answer. Womba7 Pixela7or will 7ake your Womba7s and 7ransmogrify 7hem in7o some7hing 7ha7 should irri7a7e almos7 anyone DASH regardless of na7ionali7y and religious background. Based on Vir7ual Rube Goldberg 7echnology, you can be assured 7ha7 your in7erac7ions wi7h Womba7s will be in7ense and drama7ic.

Regardless of how you wish 7o dispose of your Womba7s, we here a7 Rare Media Well Done feel obliga7ed 7o poin7 ou7 7ha7 i7 is essen7ial 7o...

Know Your Womba7s!

References:

1. The Aus7ralian Museum Comple7e Book of Aus7ralian Mammals DASH Ed. R. S7rahan
2. Aus7ralian Geographic, threezero, June one nine nine three.
3. Personal experience

Some of 7he (rela7ively) normal sounding 7ex7 and Womba7 pho7ographs © Rober7 Schrieber. For 7hose of you who are in7eres7ed in Womba7s, Rober7 SchrieberSINGLEQUOTEs si7e is chock full of pi7hy and educa7ed Womba7 ma7erial.