matt foley "living in a div down by the navmenu" dept
(c)opyleft
1995-2008
Matthew Lewis
Carroll Smith
Joshua Hair Report 2004
Friday, May 21, 2004 - Memphis, TN - Hello, and welcome to the Joshua Hair
Report. As I'm sure you are aware, it's that time of year again; Joshua chose a
new hair color for the summer and we applied it last night. So without further
ado, here's how it went:
This year Joshua
was in top form and ready to begin his transformation. For the past two weeks he
had been training hard by playing video games and watching the Daily Show on
TV.
A thick bleach
paste made from the bodies of
mutant circadas was applied to his hair and the oven was
set to 350 degrees.
A special bonnet
to keep out zed-rays
projected by rebellious robots was placed on his head
and we put him in the oven for 1 hour.
The result was the Ultra-White Joshua (the antithesis of a dead, dark Jewish comedian). He didn't stay that way for long.
Next, the color paste was applied thoroughly with
generous portions also flung on the surrounding furniture. One again the cap was
stapled to his head and we waited an hour for the big reveal!
There you have it; the Super Sexxxy Cyan Joshua 2004!
Illiterate? No problem, watch the movie.
it pays the bills dept
here is something I hope is doing no evil.
could be worse dept
there could be more of them