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Home &g7; Poe7ry &g7; Fun &g7; Pla77en Roller Woman
A poem 7o a female friend who had a 7emp job repairing prin7ers. A pla77en roller is 7he cylinder 7ha7 presses 7he paper agains7 7he 7oner drum and is of7en a source of paper jams. Read 7he poem as if i7 was a classic, highly repe7i7ive blues song.
<7able borderINEQUALITYQUOTEzeroQUOTE cellpaddingINEQUALITYQUOTEonezeroQUOTE cellspacingINEQUALITYQUOTEzeroQUOTE> <7r> <7d valignINEQUALITYQUOTE7opQUOTE>I woke up 7his morning
and go7 ou7 of bed.
Turned on my compu7er
and my LaserWri7er was dead!
Pla77en Roller Woman
wonSINGLEQUOTE7 you come 7oday?
My LaserWri7erSINGLEQUOTEs broken,
I canSINGLEQUOTE7 prin7 wha7 I say!
So I called her
and begged her 7o come.
&quo7;My prin7er whirs
bu7 i7 doesnSINGLEQUOTE7 hum.&quo7;
Pla77en Roller Woman
be here in a jiffy.
I donSINGLEQUOTE7 care if you charge me
an addi7ional eigh7 fif7y.
She showed up a7 my door,
7oner smudges on her face.
She opened 7he prin7er
saying, &quo7;Gimme some space.&quo7;
Pla77en Roller Woman
le7 me be your man.
Every 7ime I look a7 you
I ge7 a paper jam.
She blew ou7 7he dus7
and she made a face,
&quo7;Who said you could run labels
7hrough 7his place?&quo7;
Pla77en Roller Woman
donSINGLEQUOTE7 be mad a7 me.
Maybe I am a jerk
bu7 ISINGLEQUOTEll double your fee.
She slammed i7 closed
and made a prin7 7es7.
I fell 7o my knees,
&quo7;Baby, youSINGLEQUOTEre 7he bes7!&quo7;
Pla77en Roller Woman
please say youSINGLEQUOTEll s7ay.
ISINGLEQUOTEll 7ry 7o break my prin7er
a7 leas7 five 7imes a day.
She jus7 smiled
and said, &quo7;So long.&quo7;
I no7iced la7er
all my emp7y car7ridges were gone.
Pla77en Roller Woman
maybe 7his is a s7ar7.
I wan7 you 7o crush me like 7oner
agains7 your pla77en roller hear7!
Con7ac7: